Contrary to what my FaceBook world would tell you, I’m a pretty private person. When I am struggling with something, I really really don’t want the whole world to know unless I’m good and ready to face the repercussions that brings. And I absolutely hate drama (except in the movies). I avoid it like the plague. But I’ve learned that if a righteous battle arises that I’m convicted to fight for based on the Word of God and the urging of the Holy Spirit, it’s a worthwhile platform for which to put up my dukes.
I think a lot of people are too afraid to fight a righteous fight.
And I think a lot of people are convicted by {self} righteousness, rather than the righteousness of God and dress themselves in their boxing gloves to battle for the convictions of their wandering hearts rather than for the Almighty who seeks to be bound to their heart.
I think we all have individuals in our lives that simply will not be reasoned with and do not receive criticism well because they’ve been hurt.
They’ve been hurt by mean people.
They’ve been hurt by nice people.
They’ve been hurt by friends.
They’ve been hurt by family.
They’ve been hurt by themselves.
They’ve been hurt by Satan.
And they’ve even been hurt by what God has allowed.
The old adage is true that, “Hurt people hurt people.”
We’re all hurt for one reason or another. But our wounded hurts can be transformed into something so beautifully beneficial in our lives if we let our guards down a bit to learn from and through the pain.
REALLY hurt people have trouble listening to others because they’ve been wounded so many times. They see any corrections or criticisms of their behaviors as a threat to their safety and peace.
But the truth is, sometimes we all need people to get all up in our business.
Not always, in fact, for the average person, rarely.
But for the times we are living with blindspots, we really really need somebody to interrupt, make us uncomfortable, and to tell us where we are blind. Because sometimes, blind people don’t have a seeing eye dog or walking stick handy. Sometimes a blind person walks into oncoming traffic and a semi-truck is about to hit them. And sometimes, a nearby person sees this and yells out of urgency for them to move before they get hit.
But, a person who is not physically blind is not always aware of the dangers of their figurative blindness. In fact, at times, they probably feel almost deaf on top of their unbeknownst blindness because of all the voices that are being shouted at them.
When a strong voice, against the current of the other voices speaks the truth in love (even tough love) over and into the life of the person who has been blinded by the world around them, often it’s met with a defensive wall of resistance.
And the cycle of blindness and pain continues when that happens.
When the wall comes down after the shouts of the righteous, though, something truly marvelous happens. Sight isn’t restored. It’s redeemed.
The eyes we were born with are not fully opened. Light and beauty can only go so far through them.
But when prayers for the eyes of the heart are answered with affirmative answers of love, grace, and repentance, the beautiful light that pours into them is endless.
The phrase, “Follow your heart,” is terrible advice, no matter what the sentiment behind it.
Your heart on its own is wicked. That heart will lead you to destruction. Just because it feels right in your heart, does not mean that it is right{eous}.
No, your heart requires new eyes in order to arrive at full potential and beauty.
And those eyes will never come unless you break down your defenses and accept correction.
Everyone needs affirmation. It’s true.
But when less than the best choices are made and smooth words are spoken to try to gloss the ones who love an individual the most into believing that person is “OK” where he or she is, affirmation must leave and correction must enter.
Maybe you don’t get any of what I’m talking about today. Maybe it seems like I’m a five-headed creature from the black lagoon speaking Chinese. If that’s you, I hope you’re paying the most attention right now, because you may just need some new spectacles for those eyes you were born with, which seem to be failing you.
I know I’ve needed correction more than affirmation before.
I know I’ve been flattered by people, rather than put in check and it felt good. Until I fell flat on my face.
I know that, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” (Proverbs 27:6 NIV).
What about you? Where are you right now?
Are you blind about something?
Are you mad at a righteous friend for getting all up in your business? Are you offended? Are you hurt?
Good. Because your pain and blindness can be redeemed.
Don’t you want to be the best version of you? Not just for you, but for a greater purpose outside of yourself?
No? Oh, how I hope a faithful, Godly, friend will keep getting all up in your business, then. You were made to not just live, but to live abundantly. Abundant living doesn’t happen unless life is carefully pruned and tended.
And how about you, there? Are you taking the easy way out and keeping silent while your blind friend is about to be flattened to the ground by on coming traffic?
Maybe it’s time to get all up in their business and say something that could not only save their lives, but heal their blindness.
But what’s your motivation? Have you prayed it through?
Are you speaking out of self-righteousness or for the sake of righteousness?
Here’s how you’ll know: Self-righteousness is based on your feelings alone. Righteousness is a state of being set apart and living by truth.
Oh, but before I go, you there…yes, you. Are you getting all up in people’s business a bit too frequently? If so, it’s probably time to step back a bit (or a lot) and check your motivations. Do you actually have a relationship with the person who you’re talking about? What are you doing to be an active element of change in that person’s life? Why are you so interested in the decisions this person is making? Do you have any business being involved? Are you talking ABOUT the situation with people who know the person you think needs confrontation more than praying for them and actually talking directly too that person? You may mean well and hate to see the repercussions of that person’s decisions and feel that you need to “vent” to someone. But before you do that, read Matthew 18 and prayerfully approach the situation.
So, there it is.
There’s why we {sometimes} need somebody all up in our business.
I’m afraid I’ve fallen into all three categories before. I’m learning, I’ll admit it. I hope you’ll join me in walking circumspectly to avoid being too blind, too quiet, or too loud. As the adage goes, “You better check yourself before you wreck yourself.” Don’t just keep swimming. You’re meant to do more than swim.
Like my granddaddy used to say, “Any fish can swim downstream with the rest of them. But it takes a {live} fish to buck the current.”
Are you swimming downstream with the rest of them?
Or are you going to buck the current?